Wednesday, June 29, 2011

The Sabres as High School and College Stereotypes

Based solely on what I've gleaned in their mannerisms from interviews.

Thomas Vanek is...
The triple threat.  Smart, athletic, and likable, he has it all.

Derek Roy is...
The player.  Six girlfriends and a couple boyfriends for this one.

Drew Stafford is...
The lovable dork.  You know, the Chess Club Captain that's just endearing enough to be universally loved.

Jason Pominville is...
The teenaged adult.  After spending years raising his younger siblings, he's got responsibility out the ass.

Tyler Ennis is...
The frat boy.  "Yo brah, let's grab a coupla Nattys then hit the gym!"

Jochen Hecht is...
The foreign kid.  (Didn't see that one coming, did you?)

Paul Gaustad is...
The friendly jock.  Star athlete?  Who cares, he'll still hang with you.

Tim Connolly is...
The douchebag jock.  What are you looking at, dweeb?

Nathan Gerbe is...
The mastermind.  Can't outsmart this one.

Patrick Kaleta is...
The wiseass rebel.  Everyone wants to kick his ass.

Cody McCormick is...
The 22 year old junior that rides his motorcycle to high school.  Scary.

Brad Boyes is...
The new kid.

Tyler Myers is...
The 11 year old varsity starter.

Jordan Leopold is...
The theatre major.  I throw my hands up in the air sometimes...

Andrej Sekera is...
The quiet one.  Who looks like he's one bad day away from a killing spree.

Mike Weber is...
The freshman with a goatee and 30 inch biceps.

Ryan Miller is...
The jock who's cocky as hell...and good enough to back it up.

Patrick Lalime is...
That guy who's nice to everyone.

Jhonas Enroth is...
The backup QB talented enough to make the starter nervous.

Lindy Ruff is...
The principal that misses corporal punishment.

James Patrick is...
The buddy teacher.

Brian McCutcheon is...
The incompetent teacher.

Terry Pegula and Ted Black are...
The alumni who got famous and then bought the school, renovated it, and added 20,000 seat stadiums for every sport.  Even girls' bowling.

No comments:

Post a Comment