Thursday, March 3, 2011

Girlfriends: The Thirteen Musts

Since I alluded to it in an entry I posted the other day, I will list and explain my thirteen must-have qualities for anyone I date.  This will be NSWF.  There will almost certainly be breasts and vaginas and penises, and an excuse to post the Roy and Vanek pic again.


These are in no particular order of importance by the way...

1). Watches Hockey - Well this one should be pretty obvious.  I probably should narrow it down to Sabres fandom.  The Sabres are such a large part of my life I can't imagine being with anyone and not getting to share that love.

2). Smaller Than Me - Some guys like a little thickness, but I am not one of them.  I don't exactly need anorexic types, but someone I can at least lift.

3). Into BDSM or BDSM Curious -  I decided after my last girlfriend that I wasn't going to take any chances with this one anymore.  I couldn't take looking at pictures and simply wondering anymore.

4). Sexually Open - After dating a girl that was afraid to shave or give a decent blowjob I wasn't going to take any chances with this one anymore either.  I am fascinated by sex for a variety of different reasons (swear I'm the next Alfred Kinsey) and I need to be able to share that and be open with someone.

5). High Sex Drive - Because when I want to fuck, I want to fuck.

6). Oral Fixation - Because when I want a blowjob, I want a blowjob god damnit.

7). Introverted - This one should be pretty obvious to those who know me.  I like to stay in, read, watch movies.  I stay away from crowds and parties and need to be with someone who feels the same way.

8). Minimal Drinking and Drug Use - I trend to be pretty active, so I don't like being at less than a hundred percent in any way.  And I like sharing those activities with someone so it doesn't do to have them drunk out of their mind every Friday night.

9). Intelligent/Conversational - Should be kind of obvious.

10). Arty or Creative - I like to write, so I like someone who has a creative side, even if it's something completely different because I find that there is inspiration there, despite the fact that we may be reaching across artistic mediums.

11). Similar Taste in Music/Movies - At the very least, minimal interest in Top40s music and action movies, 90% of which I hate.

12). Financially Responsible - Because you could have given my ex a machine that made $100 bills every second and she still would have found a way to blow it.

13). Playful or Immature - Because I'm really just a five year old.

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