Thursday, September 2, 2010

Renaming NHL and NFL Divisions

A lot of hockey fans pine for the days of old when the divisions and conferences were named after important retired dudes.  Personally, in the spirit of candor, I favor giving the divisions descriptive names so casual fans can tell what they're going to get.  New names to the right.

Eastern Conference - The Shitty Conference but everyone watches.

Atlantic Division - The half these teams always suck division.
Northeast Division - We put all the best fanbases in one spot division.  (Except for Ottawa!)
Southeast Division - The Special Ed Division.

Western Conference - The great hockey that no one cares about conference.

Central Division - Every year fans will bitch about how these teams should be in the eastern conference division.
Northwest Division - Holy shit, awesome rivalries division.
Pacific Division - Half these teams are going to be located in central Canada in two years division.

AFC - The Good Conference

AFC East - The hey let's all have Michigan QBs division.
AFC North - Proof the color orange sucks division.
AFC South - Peyton Manning and others division.
AFC West - Musical suck division.

NFC - The Bad Conference

NFC East - The overrated division.
NFC North - The Thanksgiving spectacular division.
NFC South - More proof the color orange sucks division.
NFC West - Teams no one cares about anymore division.

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